What is happening to marriage these days? I pose the question as I’m seeing more and more of what I’m about to speak of each and every day and it’s bothersome. Is it that people lost track of what to look for in a mate, or that they don’t understand what marriage actually is actually representing? If my grandparents were alive today, unfortunately seeing this would probably give them a heart attack!
My point? I’m getting there; to explain this I’ll use different names so as not to rattle anyone. Out to dinner one night, my wife and I with another couple had a fantastic evening and then the bills came. Samantha’s husband James spoke up and said I got this one honey you got it the other night. Now, of course, I had an idea what was going on but I wanted to see if he had a different outlook on it than I’ve heard before….he didn’t.
I asked jokingly, “you got it?” We are close enough that i know James wouldn’t take offense. James then goes on to tell me that they split the bills down the center and whatever money is left over from their own paychecks is what they call a slush fund. Separate bank accounts are kept for this to do with as they please.
Now the fun began, the great debate, or what I liked to call discussion over something that no matter what he was going to tell me I wasn’t about to agree with. I was brought up with an old fashioned sort of outlook on things where what’s mine is ours and what’s hers is ours. We hold two bank accounts that are both joint one for bills and one for savings and after the bills are paid, what is left is ours. This doesn’t mean 50/50, this means that it is on a need basis. The question that always gets me flared up is when I ask, what if one of you goes through an illness or loses a job? The sad part is that the diehard people that do this usually answer as James did, “she or I would pay back what was owed upon returning to work”. Apparently, I have marriage all wrong as I thought in order to love someone completely and honestly is to trust them with absolutely everything about yourself inside and out. Am I wrong? What is your point of view?