Let’s face it, being a Mom isn’t easy. For anyone.
I do not care who you are, you have made Parenting mistakes. You HAVE, but do you know what? I don’t care. Now, that is not to say don’t vent to me about YOUR children and what you feel are YOUR mistakes, BUT that DOES mean, DO NOT vent to me about our friend that has chosen to let her 3 year old use a soother. I would also like to point out that offering that Mom unsolicited Parenting advice about how bad the soother is for her 3 year old, is just as bad.
Do you know how you make people feel?
No, really. Do you? Are you aware that if you are bashing another Mom to me, that I can’t help but feel as though you do the same thing to me when my back is turned. You have now made me feel as though I can not make mistakes around you. Do you know how much pressure that puts on me? Mom Bashing someone else to me, also makes me feel as though I am unable to vent to you when I most need to. You have now become a person I am afraid to talk to.
What about the Mom you offered the unsolicited advice to? Perhaps she had already come up with a strategy to eradicate the soother, perhaps she hasn’t. She doesn’t have to answer to you. Now she feels as though people are judging her all the time. Her confidence is lowered. What if she was already having a bad day, you just made her feel worse. She feels like a bad Mom over a Soother.
That woman at the grocery store with the crying, screaming toddler? She can hear your deep sighs and your rude comments about her “lack of Parenting” to the other patrons around you. Just be lucky I wasn’t one of those Patrons, because I would have told YOU to stick a sock in it. Mom bashing is FAR more irritating and “tacky” than a screaming toddler in a grocery store.
What Should You do When You Want to Mom Bash?
Don’t do it. Simple as that! Not even internally. Your negative self talk doesn’t help anyone, especially you. Perhaps you are judging because you need to make yourself feel better as you have been questioning your parenting methodologically lately, but focus on your success rather than what you view as someone else’s failures.
Mom’s need support, not judgement. In fact, I was always told: “If you do not have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.”
Let’s cut the Mom Bashing and perhaps start with some Mom Encouragement instead… We could ALL use a little bit sometimes!